The oil spill in the gulf brings questions to my mind about how will this affect the local fishermen, their communities, the economics, and the animals involved. First off, the fishermen that fish in the gulf rely on that for the income to support their families and to bring fresh fish to their local markets. For most families wanting local caught fish, they will see a huge increase in the price of the fish that can be bought in the store and in the restaurants. That would have the local economies, somewhat, spiral downward. That right now with our national economy doing poorly, this would bring even more hardship for most people. In which, also, will lead to fish populations decreasing more and that would lead to mass extinctions of several fish. The fish in this case are not the only animals involved here. The birds that eat off the fish would begin to die off because there would not be enough fish for the birds to eat nor the fishermen to catch. In which, that would upset the natural balance of life. That is why I would like to propose this be looked into further and how this would affect the next generation, because what would life be like without the diverse and wide variety of animals? Plus, what will local fishermen do without this?
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As I said to you yesterday, I think that you need to start the essay off with a story or some other practical example. Maybe you could review the story of a fisherman affected by the spill, or even review the events of how the spill occured and the damage it caused. Once you get through the introduction, your claims look pretty solid. I would focus more of the overall essay on the problems and keep your conclusion shorter.
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